The Alchemist Part 2
In July of 2021, I wrote a post called “The Alchemist” in which I described the moment I arrived into Houston for the first time to start my new life. Sometimes I go back and re-read my old blog posts (even the ones I have hidden because they’re cringy) just to glean a little wisdom from my old self. You see, wisdom doesn’t always come from your future self, but you can always listen to the past… and some of the conclusions I made back then just needed reminding.
“Problems are the greatest gifts of our lives. So long as I have problems, I am still alive. So long as I have problems, I have opportunity to change.”- Me, being a stupid positive ass bitch.
So much of my life has changed then. At that point, I had just arrived into Houston having zero support network in place. I was terrified, but I made it through. I described unloading what little stuff I had left to my name into my very first rental. Today, I’m a home owner and I am slowly crafting it to be the place I dreamed of so many years ago, crying on a futon in some buddy’s house.
And yet, I’m still faced with challenges of the heart and soul. These challenges I don’t want… I wasn’t prepared for… and test my abilities to hang on.
The book, the Alchemist, had given me several lessons that propelled me forward in cultivating my personal legend. I found purpose in serving others, embraced the unknown, and enjoyed the journey rather than the destination.
AND YET… there’s still much to be learned. For example, I still struggle with the concept of “faith.” Faith in myself? Yes, I suppose. Faith that things will all workout? I’m trying to embrace that. I want to have that level of faith that moves mountains. It’s hard… because the recipe for faith is confidence in yourself (which I have in abundance) mixed with… well I don’t really know?
When I need to relax, I watch this YouTube Channel called “Outdoor Boys”. It’s this dorky guy with glasses who hikes out to remote parts of the Alaskan wilderness during the harshest conditions where he does bushcraft and eats blocks of cheese. He kind of reminds me of a friendly rat. But a big cornerstone to his success is that he has unwavering faith that he’ll make it through the harsh winter nights, and that faith is based on his experiences and his religion (I guess he’s Mormon from what I’ve read). His channel is wholesome… his attitude is so positive.
I want so bad to have unwavering faith in all aspects of my life, not just at matters of the heart and my ability to see myself through challenges… but faith in the world around me. Faith in people.
“Faith, hope, love. But the greatest of these is love.” Love propels us forward… makes dreams a reality… is the soft cushion to hit when we falter (which we most certainly will at some point). To love is to have faith… faith (in a secular sense) is caring about something that is susceptible to loss. We don’t know what we truly have until it’s gone, and we don’t value what we have standing in front of us.
I guess in that sense, I do have unwavering faith.
The past cannot be changed, and the future is uncertain. The only moment we truly have is the present.
But like the Alchemist, I am the creator of my own universe. I have the power to take pain and transform it into motivation or learning. From ashes into diamonds. Sorrow into purpose. Myself into gold.
